


Very Not Luke

by CaitClandestine



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Ashton's POV, Endgame Michael/Ashton, I kinda broke Mikey sorry, Kitchen Countertop as the one and only plot device, M/M, No cliffhanger or anything I just wrote a bit and stopped, Unfinished
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-08-10 22:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7862773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaitClandestine/pseuds/CaitClandestine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ashton finds out Luke has a boyfriend by meeting Very Not Luke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Very Not Luke

**Author's Note:**

> Just an idea I had once time a while ago but can't see myself finishing, endgame was going to be Ashton/Michael, I just felt bad deleting it so here it is

The first thing Ashton notices when he finally jimmies open the door of his and Luke's shitty uni flat after being with his parents for two weeks of their autumn holidays is that Paramore's playing. The second is the general lack of Luke bounding to the door to greet him like the long limbed affectionate puppyboy he is.

Luke doesn't listen to Paramore. Well he did, but apparently the whole like two years since the whatever brothers left hasn't been enough time for him to embrace new Paramore. Ashton doesn't really care either way beyond appreciating Hayley Williams hair because it's fucking awesome.

So, Paramore. No instant Luke. Ashton sincerely hopes that Luke hasn't moved out on him or they've forgotten to pay their rent again and now some randoms are in their house and Luke's on the street somewhere. 

Ashton drops his bags into a pile by the door and decides he's going to need a drink.

“Luke?” He calls out over the music as he makes his way to the kitchen. “Lukey-wukey?”

Luke could totally be having a Paramore related breakdown or something. 

There's a guy in the kitchen and he is Not Luke. Very Not Luke in fact, with Very Not Luke electric blue hair and round eyes and from where he's sitting all the way back on their counter kneading what appears to be dough he looks about as surprised to see Ashton as Ashton is to see him. Hayley's voice comes to a sudden stop as Very Not Luke hits mute on the Iphone docked into Luke's CD player beside him.

“Who the fuck are you, what the fuck are you doing and where the fuck is Luke?”

Please, please don't let Luke be on the streets. Luke's mum will kill him, he's supposed to be using his older than one year and three whole months worth of widsom to keep her baby safe.

“Michael, kneading pizza dough and Luke is with Calum at Coles because they forgot to buy cheese” Very Not Luke says brightly, “You must be Ashton”

None of this makes sense. He's in a parallel universe for sure. Ashton doesn't know a Michael or a Calum - what if they're drug dealers and they've corrupted Luke somehow?

“Who the fuck is Calum?”

Very Not Luke (Calling him Michael would imply that Ashton knows him and he so fucking doesn't) just blinks at him, looking down at his dough and then back up Ashton.

“Calum...Lukes boyfriend?” He says slowly, like he thinks that Ashton's the once out of place here and what, no, Luke does not have a boyfriend. Or at least he hadn't when Ashton had left.

“Luke does not have a boyfriend” Ashton snaps back. “You have about thirty seconds to explain what the fuck is going on and where Luke is before I call the police”

“Woah” Very Not Luke says, lifting his arms warily, like Ashton is going to attack him. (He might) “I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that Luke was lying when he said you knew”

“Knew what?” Ashton growls, “Twenty seconds”

“Long story short Calum met Luke in that Friday afternoon uni soccer club thing they have, asked him out like three weeks ago, said you knew and invited us over tonight even though it so would've been easier at my place but anyway we decided to make pizza, Luke and Calum are genuinely out buying cheese at Coles, you can call him I swear it's the truth”

Very Not Luke lookes genuinely intimidated so Ashton figures he's not being lied to and damn it, Ashton knew he should've signed up for soccer wihen Luke had asked him to. He's not very good, but at least he could've been watching the kid from the sidelines.

“I will” He grumbles, because how the fuck has this happened this is exactly the kind of thing he's supposed to not be letting Luke do, meeting strange boys and deciding to date them and then lying to him about it. Luke always tells him everything and there's a sting in Ashtons chest as he realises that that clearly itsn't the case anymore.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, hits Luke's name. It rings out a few times before Luke picks up, “Hey Ash” He says chirpily, “Called to say you miss me?”

“What's missing is you from our apartment right now” Ashton growls and he can almost hear the smile sliding off Luke's face.

“You're home?” He asks cautiously and there's unintelligible whispering with who Ashton can only hope is Calum because if there's anymore boys he doesn't know about he's going to need more liqour than he could possibly afford.

“Luke” Ashton presses and the whispering cuts short.

“Icanexplain” Luke says in a rush, “Please don't yell at Michael, it's not his fault”

“I'm not yelling at anyone” Ashton says with a sigh, and he isn't, not anymore. “Just get your ass home, you are actually at Coles, right?”

“Yes” Luke says quietly, “We're at the checkout now”

Ashton hangs up, turns his attention back to Very Not Luke who's still sitting on their countertop and now that Ashton's ascertained that Luke is safe he can absorb the scene around him. Very Not Luke is wearing fucking cat slippers. Electric blue hair, a hoodie, trackies and fucking cat slippers. Who knows what Calum is going to look like. Ashton's never really asked about what kind of boy Luke's into. Luke's supposed to be sweet, innocent and most importantly single.

“Get off my counter” Ashton says in the most polite way he can manage, he makes his toast there and he doesn't need to like, have to disinfect it because Luke's friends have gotten ass all over it.

Very Not Luke looks awkward. “Uh” He offers hesitantly, “I sorta can't?”

It sounds like a question, and Ashtons confused. 

“You sorta can't” He repeats, “I'm serious, move your ass”

“I really can't” Very Not Luke says, “Well, if there was a fire or something I would totally throw myself onto the floor because burning but otherwise I can't get down, i'm kind of injured”

“You're fucking kidding” Ashton says quietly and he's really trying not to yell but Very Not Luke is getting on his nerves. Very Not Luke looks fine. Having ridiculous hair is not an illness and the way he speaks so casually, as if expecting that Ashtons just going to drop it is immediately annoying. It's not really about the counter, it's the prinicpal of the whole thing. The flat is like, sixty percent Ashtons and therefore, what he says goes. It's his counter.

“The minute Calum's back he'll get me down, since he's the asshole who put me up here anyway, I literally cannot get down by myself no matter how much you glare at me” Very Not Luke continues.

Ashton takes a deep, calming breath. All he wants is for Very Not Luke to get down so he can make himself a very large rum and coke. Mostly rum. The time for coke is long gone. He must look absolutely pissed off (Which he is), because Very Not Luke wiggles awkwardly.

“I really am stuck up here” Very Not Luke says quietly, “I'm kinda paralysed from the waist down dude”

And Ashton goes from being pissed off to like, substantially less pissed off and more kind of sheepish. He's not an asshole and yelling at people makes him feel bad, espeically when it's unjustified. It's not Very Not Luke's fault that Luke has a whole new life thing going on. Still, a tiny part of him wonders if Very Not Luke is lying and he can't help the way his eyes flick over to the flour covered wooden spoon in the middle of the kitchen table because really, who the fuck just announces that kind of serious stuff so easily, like it's not a big deal? Even with them both being (As as he knows) teenage boys at uni there's a line and Very Not Luke is walking it.

“Don't you dare” Not Luke says, somehow managing to read Ashtons mind. “By all means call Calum if you think i'm lying, but don't you even fucking think of touching me with that”

Not Luke's whole demeanor has changed, the friendliness he's been practically bursting with all but disappeared. To be fair, Ashton is aware that poking strangers, particularly strangers that are indeed injured is not a socially acceptable thing.

He takes another deep breath, and a couple more for good measure. Luke has a boyfriend. Luke's boyfriend has a crippled friend. They're making pizza from scratch in their shitty little kitchen and can he even think the word crippled without it being offensive because even in his head with how mad he is Ashton feels a tad guilty. Very Not Luke would probably be offended, especially after the spoon thing. Great, now he's definitely the asshole here and he's not the once with super secret boyfriend.

“I'm going to make myself a drink” Ashton announces, “And then i'm going outside to wait for Luke”

Very Not Luke just nods at him. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Drink poured - and Ashton was oh so aware of Very Not Luke's eyes on him, following him around the room, the dough all but forgotten about, he heads back out the front door (He wouldn't necessarily be okay with leaving someone in their apartment but it's not like Very Not Luke can steal anything anyway, except for maybe the bowls in the cupboard to his left or the spoons in the drawer under his legs) and down the two flights of stairs to sit in the carpark like a creeper and wait for Luke.

The stairs pose another question though; how did Not Luke get up there? Ashton would struggle to carry Luke that far and he likes to think he's a pretty fit guy – maybe Calum is a bodybuilder or something and the thought makes him shiver. If Luke's going to have a surprise secret boyfriend he'd really prefer if it was someone he's got at least half of chance of threatening.

It's a good five minutes before a beat up navy blue Commodore pulls in and Ashton downs the remainder of his drink. No one in their building has that kind of car. 

Luke tumbles out first and he looks terrified, hesitantly wandering his way over and Ashton feels a little bit guilty. He doesn't want Luke to be sad but at the same time he wants all the details and he wants them yesterday.

First things first though, Ashton wants to see this Calum and a jumper-clad figure grabs a bag of what is presumably the forgotten cheese and comes around the other side of the car he's not disappointed.

He's pretty damn fine looking, messy black hair and caramel skin and he's smiling, which is a good start.

Luke's come to a stop a few metres from the gutter Ashtons still sitting in and Calum quickly makes his way over, nudges Luke with his shoulder.

“Um” Luke squeaks and Ashton takes pity on the kid. He loves him, really. And he can probably beat the shit out of Calum if need be.

“Secret boyfriend, huh?” He addresses them both, looks Calum straight in the eye and Calum watches him right back.

“I'm sorry!” Luke says quickly, “I was going to tell you, I promise!”

Ashton raises an eyebrow. “Were you now?”

“Ijustwantedtobesureitwasgonnaworkoutanditallhappenedsofastandthenyouwentawayand, and”

Luke's speaking so fast Ashton struggles to keep up and it's really difficult to keep a straight face because he knows that Luke wouldn't ever keep things from him on purpose. 

“Luke” Ashton says, holding out his arms in a silent invitation for one of their supremely awesome best friends ever hugs. “Shut up and get over here”

He holds Luke tightly and squeezes him for a moment before he lets go and not so subtly pushes him back towards Calum.

“I'm Calum” Calum says politely, holding out a hand, which Ashton takes like the gentleman he is.

“Ashton” Ashton says, even though it's probably uncecessary. “Now” He continues, “Kiss”

Luke's eyes nearly bug out of his head. “What, no” He hisses, “What are you going on about?”

“At least hug then” Ashton says, “Prove that you're boyfriends and that Calum isn't some street hoodlum that's going to take you away to his drug lair”

What Ashton's actually hoping to do – he's not into voyeurism or anything (And especially not with Luke) is see what Calum's like, because Luke melts into hugs and affection of any kind if you're in any way special to him and so logic stands that he should be completely at ease with his boyfriend of nearly a month. That and he likes to make Luke blush.

Calum snorts with laughter, steps in closer to Luke. “I really can't have your best friend thinking I have a lair of any kind” He says, “And kissing you is hardly the worst way to prove that”

Luke blushes, wrings his hands and glares at Ashton before he finally relents and lets Calum wrap long arms around his neck and pull him in for chaste kiss which he melts into for a split second before wiggling away and giving Ashton a pointed look.

Ashton's satisfied. For now.

“I guess you've already met Michael” Calum says, starting to walk towards the doors of their building, “If he said anything stupid i'm sorry on his behalf, I think that hair colour has leeched into his brain”

“We've met” Ashton says dryly, “He's getting ass on my toast counter”

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They make their way back to the apartment in mostly silence, bar when Ashton trips up a step and Luke bursts out into nervous giggles.

Calum hasn't volunteered any more information about himself or Very Not Luke, who Ashton begrudingly thinks he should probably refer to by his actual name now that Luke is really here. 

Michael's exactly where Ashton left him sitting on the countertop, dough now pressed out into a mostly round shape on a baking tay Ashton didn't even know they had, not that he'd expected otherwise, though the possibility of finding Michael elsewhere and therefore him lying did cross his mind. 

“Lukey!” Michael chirps brightly, before he points an incriminating finger, “You didn't tell Ashton here about us, he could've killed me!”

“Don't be so overdramatic” Calum says, setting the cheese down onto the table, “Luke shouldn't have lied” - Calum sends a stern look Luke's way and Luke mumbles another apology, “But your life was hardly in danger”

Michael pouts, “True” He concedes, “But I could die of hunger before we get this pizza made and that's not how I want to go”

“Is it okay if the guys stay and we finish the pizza?” Luke asks quietly, and Ashton makes a show of considering it, like he'd actually kick Luke's new boyfriend and friend out.

“I want extra cheese on my slice” He says firmly, “And no pineapple”

“More pineapple for me” Luke says as Calum moves the shaped dough to the kitchen table, reaches for a jar of tomato paste.

“Hey” Michael protests, “Bring that back over here” he says before he catches Ashtons eye. “Actually there is good, I think Ashton wants his counter back”

Calum raises an eyebrow at him in silent conversation and Michael shrugs, “Yes Calum, I told him i'm crippled” He says in an obxnoisuly loud voice, “He wasn't going to take no for an answer”

“I make my toast up there” Ashton says, because he's not like, hating against the guy. He just likes his breakfast surfaces to remain unviolated and a tiny part of him cringes at the way Michael says it, like he knows how wretched the word is. Ashton feels bad all over again, swallows the last of his drink in large mouthful he very nearly chokes on.

Calum doesn't say anything, just pulls out a chair and takes the few steps over to the counter and in a weirdly fluid way scoops Michael up, turns around and suddenly Michaels in said chair, reaching for the tomato paste. It's like fucking magic. Ashton makes himself another drink while the three of them work and alright, it's pretty cute how Calum lets Luke make a smiley face out of the pepperoni and Michael insists that there be a definite and equal crust perimeter. 

It would be cuter still if Luke hadn't been keeping him in the dark all this time, but the happy glow his best friends got going on is making it difficult for Ashton to care all that much anymore. Luke's home and that's all that really matters.


End file.
